Sky Andrecheck lives on as we can see in this headline:
New, revitalized Jazz are semi-legitimate
Ballsy.
Only the most maladjusted and insecure among those on hand at EnergySolutions Arena, including the players, could have cared in the least about the final count Thursday night, when the Jazz opened their 2010 preseason against Portland in the annual Who-Gives-A-Flyin’-Rip Classic.
Yeah. Pre-season NBA basketball is the only thing on earth less meaningful then...well...regular season NBA basketball.
Not even Jerry Sloan cared about the end result. The proof? He played Kyrylo Fesenko, Earl Watson, Sundiata Gaines, Jeremy Evans, and Gordon Hayward for most of the fourth quarter, while the front-line guys spectated.
S.O.P. in preseason basketball games I would guess. I've never actually watched one. It's true. I'm not a scout so why the heck would I?
Winning a game on Oct. 7 mattered not enough to even mention the score here.
Yuck! That sentence left a bad taste in my mouth. But yes, we get the point, preseason basketball doesn't matter. I'm going to fix that sentence also: The game was so meaningless I'm not even going to mention the score.
The numbers on the board were mere digits in the lights on this insignificant night.
Right, the game lacked any meaning. It was a black hole of meaning. Put dog crap in one hand and the meaning of that game in the other and see which one gets filled first. We all get it.
The real issue was how the new and revitalized Jazz would fit together in their first taste of semi-legitimate competition against a semi-legitimate opponent in semi-legitimate circumstances.
The semi-legitimate short answer? Semi-legitimate.
That's some legitimately terrible writing from a semi-legitimate journalist.
But semi-legitimate enough for Deron Williams to believe this bunch of Jazz players could be the best he’s ever competed with in his six seasons here. His only qualifiers: “Once we start clicking,” and, “We’re going to need that second group.”
Why even list these cliche's? Why? And what was Deron supposed to say? "Yeah, without Boozer we're much worse off. I've pretty much written the season off and look forward to playing for the Heat in the future."
The first group, a starting lineup of Williams, Raja Bell, Al Jefferson, Paul Millsap, and Andrei Kirilenko, rolled up a big lead on the Blazers, and from there ... planted a new seed that looked promising, indeed.
The first group 'planted their seed' in the Blazers. Heh...
That's it for me. The rest of the article is a good analysis of the Jazz players and how they looked. Nothing more to see here folks.
Case Closed.
Friday, October 8, 2010
Bringing Back a Classic
If firejoemorgan.com had a pet peeve it was the use of the term, "true yankee". They had plenty of articles ripping journalists who applied the term to anyone who got a game winning hit for the 'Evil Empire'. Well I intend on continuing the tradition and thanks to Joel Sherman:
Crucial hits make Berkman true member of Yankees
Interesting, I had assumed the trade made him a member of the...oh wait! Joel wrote "TRUE" member. Exactly. Because you see, if you get game winning hits (Boone) you're a "true" Yankee. If you a choke artist like A-rod up until last year, then you're just some bum collecting a paycheck, whether you're the best player on the team or not.
MINNEAPOLIS — Lance Berkman resided in an interesting place as he came to bat in the fifth inning last night.
Wait a second, wait...wait...wait...You can become a true Yankee in the 5th inning? I'm pretty sure that according to the rules you can only become one in the 8th inning or later. Because everyone knows getting a hit in the 5th inning is a lot easier than getting one in the 9th. Just a scientific fact.
Technically, he was a Yankee. He had the uniform, drew a paycheck signed by a Steinbrenner, enjoyed the company of a clubhouse saturated with All-Stars.
If you're not a Yankees fan, you probably get how arrogant that last line sounds. True or not.
But even Berkman admitted he wasn’t really a Yankee. He acknowledged that “they were making the playoffs with or without me.” And since his July 31 acquisition, it has essentially been without him. There were days he seemed to be hitting with a wet sock rather than wood,
I'm sorry, but is it harder to swing a wet sock than a dry one? What does the dampness of a sock have to do with the metaphor?
...so stingless were his at-bats,
That's called mixing your metaphors kids.
so lacking in meaning were his regular-season efforts.
What? His efforts lacked meaning? What on earth does that mean? And could he write it in a more pretentious way?
Thus, with the score tied 1-1 in Division Series Game 2, Berkman was still searching.
I guess so. No journalist/writer now-a-days should start a sentence with 'thus'. It just makes you sound like a cardigan wearing twerp. Thus, people want to beat you up.
He had talked quite a lot about having a moment or two in the playoffs that would make his brief stay with the Yankees more than a footnote, more than an unfortunate pitstop in a terrific career gone to seed.
And ANOTHER mixed metaphor. Congrats. By the way, my great-grandmother called and said no one's used "gone to seed" since the Haymarket Riots.
Carl Pavano threw a 2-0 changeup that dipped down in the zone. At that moment, Berkman had accumulated 107 Yankee at-bats and registered one homer. Heck, there were a lot of batting practices against 60 mph pitches from coaches when Berkman could not get a ball out of the park. In the Yankee Game 2 lineup, the only player less likely to be able to get over the deep center-field wall at Target Field than Berkman was Brett Gardner.
Ha. Also, Gardner, not a true Yankee yet. Though I believe being brought up in the system means different rules apply to you. I'd need to check my manual on "Yankee-ness".
Yet Berkman did not just get it over the wall to put the Yankees ahead 2-1, “he got it over our bullpen,” hitting coach Kevin Long said. “That ball was crushed.”
Rule 2.1 The farther the home run goes, the more of a Yankee the player becomes.
It was his first postseason homer since Oct. 17, 2005, NLCS Game 5, Astros vs. Cardinals; coincidentally that homer also coming in support of Andy Pettitte.
In those days, Berkman was renowned for gap-to-gap might that was mainly absent as a Yankee before last night. He went over center fielder Denard Span’s head again in the seventh inning, launching a double so far that it actually scored Jorge Posada all the way from first with the run that would put the Yanks ahead for good.
“You don’t feel you are part of the team until you do something to help the team,” Berkman said.
That's fine, I think we can all understand that. You show up halfway through a season and you might not feel like you are part of the team. I get it.
So now he is a Yankee, the offensive star in a 5-2 triumph that sent the Twins to their eighth straight playoff loss to the Yankees.
First, lets all laugh at the Twins ineptness. Alright, now lets laugh at the arrogance of a member of the press bestowing "Yankee-ness" on a major league baseball player.
So he didn’t come to New York to hit third. He came to put a coat of paint on that season. He wanted to know for sure if his lost passion was about meaningless games in Houston or something gone dead in his batteries forever. He says now “in my heart, I know this was the right move.”
When did he say he lost his passion? And yeah, leaving a dead team for the perennial favorites
was the right move, brilliant.
And he turned out to have something left in more than his heart.
Just UGH...Baseball has that magic thing, I get it, but this is just 'Disney sappy'.
He still had enough that after getting a favorable call — Pavano’s 1-2 pitch in the seventh was probably strike 3 — he could still capitalize. He walloped the next pitch for a double that ultimately brought an infuriated Twins manager Ron Gardenhire out to complain and, ultimately, to get ejected over that likely missed call. Berkman now had five hits in 12 career at-bats off Pavano, all for extra bases.
Gee, so maybe it had less to do with his heart and more to do with him being able to dominate the pitcher he was facing. It might have a little more to do with talent. I dunno, that's just me.
But the homer and double last night were particularly sweet. They allowed him to step inside the velvet rope and really join the Yankees.
Ehhh...clubs like that tend to be filled with boring, vapid people anyway. Personally I don't think its worth the effort to get in.
Case Closed!
Crucial hits make Berkman true member of Yankees
Interesting, I had assumed the trade made him a member of the...oh wait! Joel wrote "TRUE" member. Exactly. Because you see, if you get game winning hits (Boone) you're a "true" Yankee. If you a choke artist like A-rod up until last year, then you're just some bum collecting a paycheck, whether you're the best player on the team or not.
MINNEAPOLIS — Lance Berkman resided in an interesting place as he came to bat in the fifth inning last night.
Wait a second, wait...wait...wait...You can become a true Yankee in the 5th inning? I'm pretty sure that according to the rules you can only become one in the 8th inning or later. Because everyone knows getting a hit in the 5th inning is a lot easier than getting one in the 9th. Just a scientific fact.
Technically, he was a Yankee. He had the uniform, drew a paycheck signed by a Steinbrenner, enjoyed the company of a clubhouse saturated with All-Stars.
If you're not a Yankees fan, you probably get how arrogant that last line sounds. True or not.
But even Berkman admitted he wasn’t really a Yankee. He acknowledged that “they were making the playoffs with or without me.” And since his July 31 acquisition, it has essentially been without him. There were days he seemed to be hitting with a wet sock rather than wood,
I'm sorry, but is it harder to swing a wet sock than a dry one? What does the dampness of a sock have to do with the metaphor?
...so stingless were his at-bats,
That's called mixing your metaphors kids.
so lacking in meaning were his regular-season efforts.
What? His efforts lacked meaning? What on earth does that mean? And could he write it in a more pretentious way?
Thus, with the score tied 1-1 in Division Series Game 2, Berkman was still searching.
I guess so. No journalist/writer now-a-days should start a sentence with 'thus'. It just makes you sound like a cardigan wearing twerp. Thus, people want to beat you up.
He had talked quite a lot about having a moment or two in the playoffs that would make his brief stay with the Yankees more than a footnote, more than an unfortunate pitstop in a terrific career gone to seed.
And ANOTHER mixed metaphor. Congrats. By the way, my great-grandmother called and said no one's used "gone to seed" since the Haymarket Riots.
Carl Pavano threw a 2-0 changeup that dipped down in the zone. At that moment, Berkman had accumulated 107 Yankee at-bats and registered one homer. Heck, there were a lot of batting practices against 60 mph pitches from coaches when Berkman could not get a ball out of the park. In the Yankee Game 2 lineup, the only player less likely to be able to get over the deep center-field wall at Target Field than Berkman was Brett Gardner.
Ha. Also, Gardner, not a true Yankee yet. Though I believe being brought up in the system means different rules apply to you. I'd need to check my manual on "Yankee-ness".
Yet Berkman did not just get it over the wall to put the Yankees ahead 2-1, “he got it over our bullpen,” hitting coach Kevin Long said. “That ball was crushed.”
Rule 2.1 The farther the home run goes, the more of a Yankee the player becomes.
It was his first postseason homer since Oct. 17, 2005, NLCS Game 5, Astros vs. Cardinals; coincidentally that homer also coming in support of Andy Pettitte.
In those days, Berkman was renowned for gap-to-gap might that was mainly absent as a Yankee before last night. He went over center fielder Denard Span’s head again in the seventh inning, launching a double so far that it actually scored Jorge Posada all the way from first with the run that would put the Yanks ahead for good.
“You don’t feel you are part of the team until you do something to help the team,” Berkman said.
That's fine, I think we can all understand that. You show up halfway through a season and you might not feel like you are part of the team. I get it.
So now he is a Yankee, the offensive star in a 5-2 triumph that sent the Twins to their eighth straight playoff loss to the Yankees.
First, lets all laugh at the Twins ineptness. Alright, now lets laugh at the arrogance of a member of the press bestowing "Yankee-ness" on a major league baseball player.
So he didn’t come to New York to hit third. He came to put a coat of paint on that season. He wanted to know for sure if his lost passion was about meaningless games in Houston or something gone dead in his batteries forever. He says now “in my heart, I know this was the right move.”
When did he say he lost his passion? And yeah, leaving a dead team for the perennial favorites
was the right move, brilliant.
And he turned out to have something left in more than his heart.
Just UGH...Baseball has that magic thing, I get it, but this is just 'Disney sappy'.
He still had enough that after getting a favorable call — Pavano’s 1-2 pitch in the seventh was probably strike 3 — he could still capitalize. He walloped the next pitch for a double that ultimately brought an infuriated Twins manager Ron Gardenhire out to complain and, ultimately, to get ejected over that likely missed call. Berkman now had five hits in 12 career at-bats off Pavano, all for extra bases.
Gee, so maybe it had less to do with his heart and more to do with him being able to dominate the pitcher he was facing. It might have a little more to do with talent. I dunno, that's just me.
But the homer and double last night were particularly sweet. They allowed him to step inside the velvet rope and really join the Yankees.
Ehhh...clubs like that tend to be filled with boring, vapid people anyway. Personally I don't think its worth the effort to get in.
Case Closed!
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